Holes

It’s hard to write on this blog when I’m hurting, which tends to be anytime when I leave a group of people behind. They are scattered around the world now – Japan, Finland/England, Georgia, Portland, Korea (soon). As they settle in new places, I rejoice with their adventures and, frankly, I admire their courage. But that doesn’t make it any easier. Coming “home” to find that all of my friends are everywhere else is never a simple task for me. Then again, traveling to my friends away from my family is also hard, but that’s another story.

Anyway, the main thought I have right now is that these holes in my heart are the greatest gift I’ll ever have. It’s sloppy and sentimental and silly, but hey, it’s true. 13 year old me never thought I’d have a best friend, much less 6 of them floating about. That means I will always miss them. It will always hurt. But then again, how many people have that many friends who are worth keeping in contact with? Who they can turn to if anything goes wrong? Who they can love unashamedly without worrying about hiding?

Every day, I need to be giving thanks for the holes in my heart.